Do you ever get one of those "eureka" moments?
It seems with me, most realizations are "eureka" moments. It seems like things are going on and on and on and then one day, just like that, I "get" it.
Looks like James had a much better understanding of love than I did. Maybe it is because he comes from a totally different culture, maybe he is more worldly or just plain smart. He has been trying to tell me, show me, for the past year or so but it wasn't until recently that I "got" it.
You see, I, like many other young girls, was waiting for Mr. Right. That "One" that would come along and be the perfect fit, no assembly required, and we would walk hand in hand in the sunset and live happily ever after, the End, roll the credits.
What I didn't realize was, what a pitfall for failure such an attitude was. There is not one right person for each and every one of us. In fact there are a number of compatible mates for each and every one of us. What makes us up end up with A instead of B is a matter of choice. There is no "puzzle piece" fit, but rather the "Play Dough" phenomenon in love... you know, two different colors coming together, touching and their edges blend a little forming a whole new third color. They get bent out of shape from time to time but also merge and interact.
Love takes time, a marriage needs constant work and yes there is some, *a lot* even, assembly required. Regular maintenance too!
I think true love is grateful and it has nothing to do with big acts or dramatics.
You don't have to run through an airport for one last kiss James, for me to love you...
It's the little things that actually make love what it is and falling in and out of love is also, largely a choice. I fell in love with you for the little things... and I won't fall out of love because I chose to dive in willingly and I am choosing daily to stay in.
My love, I get it... I truly get it now. What you have been trying to tell me for over a year now. We will be together not because we are soul mates, not because we are a perfect fit... but because we will both chose to work on it, to stay in it and to never go to bed angry.
So, I promise you... you won't have to run through an airport for my love, or move the stars or offer me the moon... a big hug at the end of a tiring day, my ear on your chest, listening to your heart, your arm around my shoulders and the first "good morning" of the day, are enough.
True love wakes up with bad breath, true love desires to nurture, to raise you on its shoulders when you stumble and fall or when you are just too tired to do the daily little things one more time.
True love holds our hands through the hard times and once in a while brings you your favorite flowers.
True love might have dark circles under its eyes. True love will from time to time, hurt you but never intentionally and true love will on occasion, fight... but true love will always fight to find its way back to you. True love is living every tiny, small and often tedious moment of life together.
There is no Mr. Right. There is no "soul mate", there is no "One".
I gift myself to you and that is all that I can give you... 100% of me is all that I can promise you. To love and cherish you and trust my heart in your hands... I can't promise I will never get mad at you. I can't promise I will never disappoint you. I can't promise I won't lose my sh*t from to time.
But I can promise you that I will fight for you, I will yearn for you, that I will respect you even when I disagree with you ... and that, that, is true love.
You will never have to run through an airport for me... but the hot cup of too sweet coffee is greatly and deeply appreciated and never taken for granted.
It seems with me, most realizations are "eureka" moments. It seems like things are going on and on and on and then one day, just like that, I "get" it.
Looks like James had a much better understanding of love than I did. Maybe it is because he comes from a totally different culture, maybe he is more worldly or just plain smart. He has been trying to tell me, show me, for the past year or so but it wasn't until recently that I "got" it.
You see, I, like many other young girls, was waiting for Mr. Right. That "One" that would come along and be the perfect fit, no assembly required, and we would walk hand in hand in the sunset and live happily ever after, the End, roll the credits.
What I didn't realize was, what a pitfall for failure such an attitude was. There is not one right person for each and every one of us. In fact there are a number of compatible mates for each and every one of us. What makes us up end up with A instead of B is a matter of choice. There is no "puzzle piece" fit, but rather the "Play Dough" phenomenon in love... you know, two different colors coming together, touching and their edges blend a little forming a whole new third color. They get bent out of shape from time to time but also merge and interact.
Love takes time, a marriage needs constant work and yes there is some, *a lot* even, assembly required. Regular maintenance too!
I think true love is grateful and it has nothing to do with big acts or dramatics.
You don't have to run through an airport for one last kiss James, for me to love you...
It's the little things that actually make love what it is and falling in and out of love is also, largely a choice. I fell in love with you for the little things... and I won't fall out of love because I chose to dive in willingly and I am choosing daily to stay in.
My love, I get it... I truly get it now. What you have been trying to tell me for over a year now. We will be together not because we are soul mates, not because we are a perfect fit... but because we will both chose to work on it, to stay in it and to never go to bed angry.
So, I promise you... you won't have to run through an airport for my love, or move the stars or offer me the moon... a big hug at the end of a tiring day, my ear on your chest, listening to your heart, your arm around my shoulders and the first "good morning" of the day, are enough.
True love wakes up with bad breath, true love desires to nurture, to raise you on its shoulders when you stumble and fall or when you are just too tired to do the daily little things one more time.
True love holds our hands through the hard times and once in a while brings you your favorite flowers.
True love might have dark circles under its eyes. True love will from time to time, hurt you but never intentionally and true love will on occasion, fight... but true love will always fight to find its way back to you. True love is living every tiny, small and often tedious moment of life together.
There is no Mr. Right. There is no "soul mate", there is no "One".
I gift myself to you and that is all that I can give you... 100% of me is all that I can promise you. To love and cherish you and trust my heart in your hands... I can't promise I will never get mad at you. I can't promise I will never disappoint you. I can't promise I won't lose my sh*t from to time.
But I can promise you that I will fight for you, I will yearn for you, that I will respect you even when I disagree with you ... and that, that, is true love.
You will never have to run through an airport for me... but the hot cup of too sweet coffee is greatly and deeply appreciated and never taken for granted.
No comments:
Post a Comment